The real change

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Changing

Every new year, we make up resolutions and goals to inspire us to go forth and achieve certain things during the year. Now I’m not going to go into whether we achieve them or not. That we’ll talk about later. My real concern here is when the real new year is and how it should be celebrated.

Your birthday is one of the most important days to take stock and change your habits for the better. Yes, we never stop making resolutions because we can always improve on different areas of our lives and become better people. I’m writing this post a week before my birthday because I’m taking stock and seeing what areas of my life I’ve done well and what really needs to change. Starting a week earlier will give me enough time to clear my head and work on myself. Also, I’m starting my 3rd year of university next week so I’ll also have a plan for my academic year. I’ve never done this before but I’m going to start and I want to share my plan with you because it could be helpful whether your birthday is fast approaching or is in the next year. You could always look back at this blog for reference.

Here are a few things to do before your birthday for a successful year.

1. Be grateful 

Acknowledge that you’ve come so far and be grateful for another year added to your life. That means that you still have a lot to fulfill in life and you’ve got to work out ways to fulfill them. Write down what you’re grateful for in a notebook.

2. Your notebook

You need to have 2 notebooks every year. One for the start of the year and the other when you turn a year older. Why? The first one is where you write your goals, daily plan and track your progress. The next one is where you write what you’re grateful for, spiritual matters, how you’re feeling, songs you like, poems to inspire, books you plan on reading, how to think positively or how you want to inspire others. (See my birthday notebook above).

3. Get a GOOD book

A good book while inspire you and change your perspective. Write a realistic list of books you will be reading as the year goes by to remind you to keep dreaming big and working on your goals. I’m now reading ‘The Subtle Art of not Giving a F*ck’ by  Mark Manson and my perspective about things is changing. I’m now learning what I should really care about in life.

4. Take care of yourself 

Monitor your health. Are your eating habits alright? Is there something you need to change in your diet? You could also do a general medical check up to ensure you’re in good health. Have you been exercising? Do you eat fruits and vegetables? Do you take enough water? Is your skin and hair healthy? Could you be using any harmful products? Do you monitor your screen time? These are the questions to be answered in your birthday notebook.

5. Relationships

You need to have healthy relationships with others. This is the time to forgive yourself and forgive others. Make things right and be intentional about your relationship with other people.

6. Review

Do a review of your previous year in your birthday notebook. Look at what you have achieved. Whether you’re happy with what you’re doing, who you are and who you’re with e.g your career choice, job, friends and lover. Check on your financial status and how you can improve on it. Save more if you need to.

7. Get a theme

Write down what your year will be about. You can have a theme and remind yourself every morning about it. Your theme could be ‘Hygge’, ‘Grace, love, light’, ‘Grind, God, Focus’. Just about anything that will inspire you.

8. Fabulous

Fabulous is an app that will help you develop good habits. It reminds you to read your bible, be grateful, drink water, eat healthy. You could take 10 minutes daily to set up habits and track your progress using this app. So download it and see what works for you.

9. Be ready

Prepare your mind for change. Be optimistic and purposeful about this change. Go without fear and without turning back, And in those bad days when you forget why you started, open your notebook. This is why you need to write things down.

10. Plan on how you want to spend you want to spend your birthday

Write what you’ll do when you wake up, where you want to spend your birthday, what you’re going to eat, who you want to spend your birthday with. You don’t have to spend so much money on this day if you don’t have the means. Doing this may start your new year on a really bad note. What’s more important than spending so much money on this day is how you’re feeling. Stay happy, stay positive.

Until next time,

21 and still savvvvvvy,

Chelsea

 

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When You’re at the Edge

 

I attended a church session on rejection and depression, first because I really had never paid attention to these two issues and I wanted to educate myself, secondly because I wanted to look out for myself and others. Of course I already had a preconceived idea that it would be boring since I honestly had no in depth knowledge about rejection and depression. I’ve seen campaigns and articles about these two issues but unfortunately it just hadn’t hit me yet. Not because I’m perfect and my life is so great, sincerely, I’ve had days that I’ve hit rock bottom but because I hadn’t paid attention to myself, to others and to events. I also, fortunately or unfortunately, grew up believing that we’ve just got to be strong cause it’s life and life is just life. But I was so wrong. I now realize that the feelings we ignore come to later manifest in very many ugly ways like selfishness, anger, pessimism, narcissism and the list is endless.

At the Edge

During the session, I was thinking about the many times I’ve been at the edge. Just about to jump off the cliff. The verge between choosing to manage your problems or letting them manage you. I suddenly knew that I have been able to go through a lot. Having gone through them doesn’t mean that they were easy or irrelevant but that somehow I chose, consciously or subconsciously, to do something about them, whether it be sleeping, doing things that make me happy, talking to friends, reading and drawing. I thought of the many things I had thought of doing out of anger and desperation and I was very grateful that I hadn’t done them. Even though I didn’t deal with the problems immediately, I put them off until I was ready to think clearly through them. It helped me survive and live through it to share it with you and others.

Rejection

Rejection can be perceived or real. A perceived rejection may come out of fear therefore you already believe that you have been rejected without even trying while a real rejection is real. You could be and will be rejected from a job, by friends, lovers or even yourself. Yes, yourself. For example by not paying attention to yourself and your feelings or believing negative things about yourself or always being pessimistic about your life or even not taking good care of yourself. Rejection hurts but one way to deal with it is to prepare yourself for it and understand yourself well. Think of why you’re being rejected. If its something that you can change then change it if you want to, if necessary. But if it’s something you can’t change then whoever can’t accept you is being unfair and maybe prejudiced and you don’t need them.

When it comes to rejecting yourself, you need to think about why you don’t treat yourself well. It could be because of circumstances, careless words other people say and you think about it until you believe it or lack of will and determination or belief in yourself. Work out ways to believe in yourself more. Have a plan and purpose for your life.

There will also come a time when you will have to reject others. Do so if you need to but remember that they’re human. It’s not easy, but letting other people go is so much better than leading them on with no intention of having them in your life. Let them go when you let them go. You might have guilt and want to be friends or lovers or colleagues again but it’s better to be clear where your relationship with the other person stands. Forgive them and forgive yourself.

On purpose

Everything happens for a reason. To teach you something or help you avoid a danger you hadn’t foreseen. You’ve got to trust that God has great plans for you and He won’t let you go. So hold on when you’re at the edge. Your problems won’t magically disappear but with time, you’ll see that it all worked out for the good of yourself or someone else.Try to be positive and see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s not easy but when you do that, you will survive.

Weeping may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning. ˜Psalms 30:5

Until next time,

Purposefully savvvvvy,

Love, Chelsea.

 

 

 

Beyond the Stars

Music makes me happy as it does everyone, and for the longest time, I didn’t just want to listen to music but to be able to make and feel music. I started writing songs when I was in primary school. I wrote cheesy songs, happy songs, crazy songs, gospel and everything everything. I made the tunes and even directed the videos in my head. I couldn’t (and still can’t sing like Sia) neither could I play any instrument, but I loved making music nonetheless.

My love for country music led me to wanna play the guitar. So me and my coloured braids enrolled in a class and it was amazing. Obviously I very much liked the idea of being a guitarist and forgot that it actually needed work. And I struggled and I struggled because music just doesn’t come naturally to me. I quit. I quit playing the guitar after learning quite a lot and being able to play most songs since I had learnt all the basic chords.

After a while, my dad so graciously bought a piano and I got interested in the piano. We already had a teacher coming to teach my younger siblings so it was very convenient for me to start playing the piano, and I did. And I’m still playing and learning more so recently since I figured it could as well turn into my career. I do online lessons from pianote since the pianists on there are pretty easy to understand. I particularly remember feeling inspired when one teacher said “Sky is the limit”. Pfffff we’ve all heard that before but the way she said it right at my moment of struggle really inspired me not only musically but generally.

Sky is the limit

My morning devotion today was about not giving up especially when you’ve tried so hard and you’re not yielding anything. There are those moments when you’ve given your project everything you’ve got but you still feel like you’re just not getting there. You scold yourself over and over saying that “If I truly would have done my best, then I wouldn’t be struggling so much right now. I’d be a professional pianist.” But that’s not true. You’ve done your best and that’s what matters. You need to honour your struggle. Nothing comes easy; so no matter how little progress you make, you need to appreciate that you’re not where you started.

‘Sky is the limit’ not people, not books, not money. Comparing yourself to others may discourage you. Some people are fast learners and others don’t have to make so much effort as you do to achieve something. Instead of complaining, enjoy your learning and trust the process. Don’t limit yourself to books too. Explore and find your own creativity and awesomeness.

Beyond the stars

When you reach the sky, go beyond the stars, there’s only space up there and not down here. That’s why it’s called space. You’re free to be anything you want to be. Have a plan, a vision board and lastly, believe. It’s so much easier to believe than to not.

Until next time,

Beyond savvvvvvvy,

Yours,

Chelsea.

Photo in this blog taken by Chelsea

 

 

 

Love Behind Beauty

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It’s women’s day today and as I’m sitting here taking a sip of my water, I’m thinking about the impact that women have made overtime. I cannot overstate women’s efforts in moulding, shaping, inspiring, loving and creating beautiful people, families and societies. There are so many special women who have helped shaped the person that I am today and I know that they can inspire you too. Here are a few women who I truly believe are love behind beauty.

  1. Jamie Grace

jamie

I started listening to her songs in high school and I really loved her creativity and her style. Her songs had such good positive messages from growing up, to boys, to love, to God, to happiness, to courage. Her YouTube channel had really good, quirky, honest and colourful videos that I could relate to as a teenager. She has always been open and honest about her struggles and her relationships. She has especially been really open about singlehood, waiting and trusting God. She also has her own fashion and style that inspires me and most of all, she really is about sharing God’s love and drawing people to Him. You can find her on YouTube Instagram and she also has her own podcast. She truly is love behind beauty.

2. Priscilla Shirer

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I started listening to Priscilla Shirer a year after I finished high school and that’s not too long ago. Her sermons really inspired me to have a closer relationship with God. She has a way of putting God’s promises on the table and she lives what she preaches. I love her creativity, her style and her show on YouTube,  Girl Chat, where she brings people to share their stories. She’s humble, bold, and funny, you’ll love her. You can find her on Going Beyond Ministries

3. Letitia Wright

the one

Of course I learnt about Letitia Wright from the Black Panther movie where she acted as ‘Shuri’. I was captivated by her acting and I started watching her interviews. Her humility and authenticity drew me in. I love her style and her trust in God. She’s out to inspire and be a blessing through her acting. Watch out for her because she’s phenomenal. In case you haven’t watched Black Panther, it would be really great if you’d watch it. Also, watch Letitia’s interviews on YouTube

There’s a lot to be said about these three women but I couldn’t possibly say it all. I am however very grateful for their positive influence not only on me but on other people as well. You realize they have some things in common that I value which are love for God, fashion, authenticity, humility, love, good character and personality. If you value these things then go over and learn more about them. If you know any women who inspire you then share with us in the comment section below.

Until next time,

Savvvvvvvvvy women,

Yours,

Chelsea.

Disclaimer: The images in this blog post have been retrieved from WomenJamiePriscilla and Letitia respectively.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Corner Couch

All alone, whether you like it or not, alone is something you’ll be quite a lot

∼Dr. Seuss

Picture this: 

You’re waiting for a friend somewhere. It could be by the road, in a coffee shop, a restaurant or just any random social place. It’s been 5 minutes and they haven’t arrived yet. You’re practically glancing at your watch every second, getting pretty impatient. A random person comes and stands/sits by you, probably waiting for someone too or just minding their own business. It starts getting pretty awkward after a while and you’re thinking that this person thinks you’re idle or bored. Then you remember that you have company. You’re phone. Lifesaver. But you have nothing to do with your phone and even if you do, you’re too anxious to concentrate or annoyed at your friend for being so late. So you scroll through random apps or listen to music -unless you’re the selfie- taking millennial you should be- and you heave a sigh of relief as your friend arrives.

I’ve been in such awkward situations before but not anymore. Not because people started coming early or because I’m the one who arrives late and absolutely not because I never have my phone. I do. But I have a reason and I’ll tell you why.

Corner Couch

We’re not comfortable with being alone and worse, we’re not comfortable with people thinking that we’re alone. That’s why our first instinct when we’re alone around people is to pull out our phone even we have absolutely nothing to do with it. This is not only toxic because it shows that we care a little too much about what people think but also because it shows that we can’t be be our own company (which in turn shows that we have a poor relationship with ourselves).

So the first problem but definitely not the worst, is that we care a little too much about what other people think. We pull out our phones not because we want to, but as a reaction to other people’s thoughts or feelings. The moment we prioritize what other people think instead of paying attention to our own thoughts, we forfeit our own peace of mind. The only time we should care about other people’s thoughts is when we need their feedback or ideas about an issue or maybe a project, in order to see whether we are heading in the right direction. But at the end of the day, their word should not be final but ours. On top of that, the only time other people’s opinions should matter is when you can truly trust that they want the best for you and you can logically see that it is the best decision to make. Otherwise, other people’s thoughts, feelings or opinions on your life are trash and should stay in their heads.

The second problem and the worst is that we have a poor relationship with ourselves. We’re not used to being our own company and we don’t know what to do when we find ourselves alone. That’s why we consult our phones, which as a matter of fact cannot replace the comfort, interaction and life that we find in the heart to heart contact with a human, even ourselves. And then you ask, “But Chelsea, what should I do as I wait for my ride to work?” Worry no more because I’m gonna show you how take the corner couch and be comfortable in it in just 1 step.

Acknowledge that you’re alone and i’ts okay to be alone. People are probably too busy minding their own business so don’t fret. Take two deep breaths and just be grateful for life. Remind yourself that you are your best company. Notice things and people. Be happy and look around. See the beauty around you as you hear the background of human chit chat. Take notice of people’s fashion and kindness. Feel the warmth of the sun or watch the rain as it drops. Read a book if you have one. Talk to someone if you can. Complement someone. Check in on your thoughts and keep them positive. Dream and live. Think about someone you love. Order a cup of coffee and a croissant if you can and feel the flavours. Give a tip. 

If you learn to spend time alone, you’re not only enjoying yourself but also you don’t have to be around toxic people just because you’re afraid of being alone. I know that it’s not easy to do but like everything else, it needs effort and practice. Grab a cup of coffee and a book, take the corner couch and get fuzzy.

To be alone is not to be lonely

Until next time,

Alone and Savvvvvvvvvy,

Chelsea with hearts.

 

-Photo in this post taken by Chelsea.

 

 

Level Up

This is going to be different but very interesting because I’m leveling up. And I’m certain that this might not go well with all of my readers but I still hope to inspire you through my motivation and determination. I’m usually excited to write this blog for you and that’s still what I’m gonna do, though differently. Lemme just get straight to the point- I’m starting to write in French to not only inspire you but also to improve my grammar and use of the language. This means that I’ll have to start writing more often because yes, I will not forget my English readers. My French is intermediate so try not to use my posts for learning purposes.

Aujourd’hui c’est la fête du travail et j’ai décidé de faire quelque chose differente grâce à la motivation des vidéos que j’ai vu sur YouTube ce matin. C’est une idée que j’ai eu hier et maintenant je realise mes rêves d’etre une ecrivaine francaise mais c’est claire que je ne suis pas une ecrivaine professionelle à cause de ma difficulté de m’exprimer. Le plus importante est que je n’utilise pas Google translate comme avant. C’est le progrès, non? Je ne peux pas ecrire beaucoup à cause de mon clavier. Normalement j’utilise l’anglais et fixer les accent comme l’ accent aigu et tout ça est trop pour moi. Donc je vais vous donner un peu des conseils de ce que j’appelle leveling up.

  1. Être soi- même

C’est à dire quoi? Vous ne pouvez pas level up sans la connaissance de qui vous voudriez être. Il faut avoir la passion dans tout ce que vous faites car la motivation vient de la passion. Il y avait un temps que je n’ai eu aucun intérêt de mieux comprendre le français mais maintenant je mange, je bois, je dors, je lis et surtout j’ecris le français. Je fais l’espagnol aussi mais c’est certes que j’aime le français mieux peut- être parce que pour moi c’est plus romantique que l’espagnole. Encore, pour moi.

2. Que voulez- vouz?

Est-ce que vous avez un rêve? C’est une question que vous rencontrez chaque fois, chaque jours, chaque minute et vous allez rencontrer cette question à  l’avenir. Je vous promis. Bon, c’est une question trés importante, trés considérable et ça evoque les pensées. Si vous connaissez que vous voulez, c’est plus façile de faites les choses que vous soulèvement.

3. Passer à l’action

En fin, agissez. Maintenant vous savez qui vous voudriez être, comment trouver la motivation, vous avez un rêve et vous connaissez que vous voulez. Vous êtes prêtez. Vous avez des ailes d’etre tout ce que vous voulez. Vous pouvez level up et volez jusqu’au ciel.

Restez- vous avvvvvvvvverti,

C’est moi,

Chelsea.

Encore, n’utilisez pas cette blogue pour apprendre le français. J’suis pas une experte mais toujours j’essaie. Vous pouvez me corriger. Merci en avance.

Also, some phrases may not make so much sense when translated so if you can understand even a bit just try to read it as it is.

 

 

Moving On!

My high school grades were a big mess and since I entered University, I really try to keep my grades up. Unfortunately, I get a tough blow sometimes here and there and I almost want to give up… and sometimes I have given up. But then I’ve had to question myself over and over again. I’ve had to remind myself why I started. I realize that I’ve suddenly developed a fear of failure and I sometimes do care what people would say if I failed. Now I realize that I don’t have to care if I fail as long as I’ve done my best and that’s what I’ve always done. And I’m here to remind you today that you can’t fail if you truly know who you are. If you work hard and you’re grounded. If you refuse to let your grades or a single failure define you.

You know you’re direction and you know what you’re passionate about and as long as you don’t stop, darling, you’re going to change the world. I promise you. So move on. Pick up those pieces and hit your challenges head- on. This is to me and to everyone else out there who’s on the verge of giving up. You’ve been given so much, use it to inspire, to live your best life. That dreaded feeling you get when you wake up? You can overcome it. Wake up early and do your thing. There ain’t no room for quitting. Move on from your nightmares, your heartache, your failures and yourself. That self that doesn’t want to move on. Move on from that. Read a book, earn a little money, save here and there, travel, read, forgive and never give up.

I never believed that I would ever get an A from high school onwards but I’ve surprised myself and I’ve proven myself wrong over and over again. See? Your biggest enemy is yourself and your fear because you and I know that you have great power and great potential and nothing can stop you. Neither you, nor I, nor anyone else. You’re too awesome, so move on.

Life savvvvvvvvvvvvy,

Yours,

Chelsea.

P.S: You realize I don’t have a picture for this blog post because I’m transitioning to using pictures that I’ve created myself.